Why I am having frequently breakups, why my relationship doesn’t work, how my friend’s relationships going smooth and why not mine?
These are the questions may knock in your mind when you have the breakup.
Generally, most of us blame our destiny for our breakups but do it help you the next relationship work. The answer is “NO” so before jumping into the next relationship you have to find the probable reasons for, why your previous relationship didn’t work.
Because of our busy lifestyle, our changing living standard changes our priorities and expectations.
If you have ever examined your past relationship, you have found a number of times when it was your fault and it was their fault. Now it’s time to rethink why that was not working out?
a) Dependent on your partner for own Happiness
This is the main reason when we are finding our happiness in someone. It is good to be happy with your partner this is why we come in the relationship.
But it becomes unhealthy when you solely rely on your partner for your happiness and you become your partner for your smiles and for bad moods.
What happens when you start finding happiness in your partner? You get anxious when he or she is not around and you become so much dependent and end up sacrificing so much of yourself.
Never forget, Happiness first comes from within you and only you can make yourself genuinely happy.
b) React without knowing the reasons
It happens a lot of times when we start over thinking. If your partner is not answering your calls and messages may be there is a reason behind this.
We generally react and thinking in opposite direction like oh yes he or she is sitting with someone.
Yes, they may be talking about some important thing or work related meetings. But when we start talking in a rude tone without even knowing the reason, this gives the signs of the insecurity to your partner and no one like this today.
Everyone wants that his girl or her women trust them.
c) Keeping an eagle eye
This is a really bad habit that watching all the time when he or she comes online and went offline. What are their last seen and then asking why you are online and not talking to me.
It never looks good when you behave like an immature person even you know there are other friends, family in their life.
When we behave in this way, you start losing your value in your partner’s life because they start feeling they are living in a cage and nobody wants this. So giving space to your partner is important and it also raises respect in your relationship for each other.
d) Acting Selfish
Always taking and not giving back until your partner has nothing more to give this is called selfishness. In a relationship, it is not always about you.
If you want to control the reins on the relationship and focusing only on your needs then it won’t be heading in a good direction.
Learn to give and feel grateful for your partner and start expressing it often in words and actions.
e) Lack of compatibility
If someone asks us why you had breakup we are not compatible but do you the reason behind this.
Compatibility is explored in different perspectives like in intimacy, personality types and in attachment styles. When you comes in a relationship just because you like him or her by their looks without knowing them properly and after few days you see oh you guys are too different from each other.
So it is better to grow your relationship by friendship.
“Maturity is not when we start speaking big things.. it is when we start understanding small things”
Maturity is the need of every relationship. When we don’t resolve our small issues in our relationship calmly and start abusing each other for tiny mistakes, this is the sign of immaturity.
Acceptance is the part of life that we always struggle with. We have to accept some flaws of our partner and things in our past and we should leave them there. If you hold your previous issues and remind our partner every day you did this and that, remember this become the one of the biggest of your breakup.
g) Taking your past into present
Today’s we were all in the relationship and gone through the breakups. You don’t need to tell when you start dating someone.
It is good to be loyal but if the person you are dating truly like you for what you are it hardly matters to them what happens in your past or with whom you are in a relationship.
And if you start talking about your past affair, he or she did this and start comparing your partner to your ex then your this behavior calls trouble in your relationship.
h) Not investing time in relationship
If you really love someone, make sure you are giving them time. It has been observed after few years or months we take our relationships too much for granted.
When you are not spending time with your partner you start creating distance. Always find time to listen to your partner and also share dreams and hopes because communication is an important part of a successful relationship.
i) Not sharing your feelings
When you are not talking openly about your relationship, then how do you expect from your partner how they feel if you won’t tell them.
You have to tell them when you had the most amazing feeling when you were together and what makes you upset. It also makes your bond stronger and you will get to know each other better.
j) Run at the first sight of Trouble
You will never be going to have a long relationship if you run at the first sign of trouble in your relationship.
Always remember every relationship have gone through the ups and downs but it doesn’t mean this is the end of story. You have to get through those low points in order to gain benefits of a relationship.
Fights, the argument is all normal in a relationship and also necessary to maintain spark in relationships. When you fight it is like you are fighting to keep your relationship and wants to sort out things.